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Recipe for The World's Greatest Kids!

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7th January 2007


Hi Everyone,

This is a series of quotes from a wonderful book I've just read this year  (permission obtained from the publisher, MetropolisInk) by Maya WindDancer Noble, titled 'Recipe for The World's Greatest Kids', 152pages.


    "Developing powers of restraint is probably the most important skill a parent can learn. All too often I hear from children's lips the maladies of their parents, their relationship, what mom says about dad (and the reverse), and the excuses their parents give for how the "ex" stopped them from doing this, that, and the other, and screwed up their life...

    "I have a word for those parents...Well, several actually. Get a clue, get a grip, get on with your life, AND STOP MAKING EXCUSES! These are children you are talking to. These children are already emotional mush-piles because you guys cannot seem to point the finger in the mirror rather than at the other person, and you cannot stop using your kids as emotional battering rams to get back at the other parent. Am I saying the offending parent is lily-white? Give me a break. Am I saying that you should not be angry with the other parent, your ex-spouse? Please. Do you think I hold warm fuzzies in my heart for a man who put my head through a wall and tried to shoot me? Of course not.

    "However, I had a choice.
    "I could do everything in my power to allow my girls to learn on their own the true nature of their biological father because, eventually, the kids would get it.
    "Or, I could verbally bash the hell out of him, screw up my daughters' young heads with anger and hatred, run the risk of someday being viewed as the bad guy, and watch my kids fall into dysfunctional relationships because of patterning behaviors that they witnessed from their parents.
    "I remember, at the height of my divorce, my parents, my friends, and nearly everyone on earth thought I was nuts because I would not allow anyone to say one bad thing about their biological father... God, that was hard - for everyone.

    "I told the therapist that I knew it did my daughter no good to learn hatred and to be sucked into that kind of world and mindset, and that she would find out for herself before long what his true colors were; I was not going to add any more to her confusion and anger. She needed a rock to come back to, not a rabid dog of a mother. She saw what he had done to me. She saw us struggling to put our lives back together. But she also saw love and what I call true "parenthood" in practice at home. No excuses, just pick yourself up and move on.
    "The therapist said if I could teach other parents that lesson, I would put her out of business - and she would love that.

    "You chose to be a parent, so be a parent - don't ask your children to parent you or themselves, and don't act selfishly.

    "See your children as gifts, not as possessions or pawns.

    "The day my daughter found out I was not Mother Theresa in disguise and really did have first-hand understanding of teenage life was the day that peace returned to her internal village.

    "If you think your kids are dumb no matter what their ages, you just pointed one finger at them and four right back at yourself.

    "Laughing at yourself teaches your kids that no one is perfect. It teaches them that self esteem comes from realizing that doing dumb things, or having a zit on your nose the night of a dance, does not affect the core of whom you are.

    "I expect my kids to be kids, but not by today's standards. I expect my kids to be kids by Creator's standards. I expect them to experience life as the incredible journey it really is...I expect them to treat others as they wish to be treated and to stick up for the underdog...I also expect my kids to have brain farts and forget they can't fly.

    "Here's a good one for you. I was once accused by someone of 'the worst case of child abuse because your children believe in angels and God'. Excuse me?...I don't think all the rubber in the world would save your tash from a reality-check lightening bolt to prove who is right."

---End quote.

This book is brilliant! It is packed with wisdom!
The book can be purchased from: (And no, I don't get any book vouchers from them!) http://www.metropolisink.com/maya/kids/index.htm

Click the link and read about Kobi's Korner, her organisation helping abused children. Most of the proceeds for the book go to Kobi's Korner. So please give...

Stay blessed,

Tony Idemudia Asakpa

Related: PAIN, PAIN, PAIN


 "In so far as a man can serve others in love, just so far, is he great." -- anonymous